My Last.....

The day you left, has long gone,
But it never leaves me anyway,
It comes back to me like the memories,
As if it were nothing but yesterday.

You said we were now good friends,
I agreed and made me understand,
But still clutching to the last strand,
I swum accross to the never land,

For i knew it would be not fair,

To give my friend more pain,

I gave my self the pain to bear,

I missed you like a bad bane.

When it was cold and you sipped,
I was howling with somithing amiss,
I needed to get you outta my head,
Finally i needed this feeling to end,

I smoked the memories,
I tried to hate you,
Ignore the pain,
Bleed it out of my viens,
Cursed my wet eyes,
I never managed to say good bye.


I waited for your call every single day
I waited for me to understand, atleast try,
But i still hear your laughter when i laugh,
but why cant i hear you when i cry?


Have you really gone so far away,
Have you finally hardened the clay,
Into the Heart that will never yield,
Is it your weapon or your shield?

Crying into my heart never on my cheek,
I vowed ill never shed a tear for you again,
I wont let my heart cry in vain,
I will only hide, never again seek,

Anymore not a boy, i was now a man,
And Big men dont every cry,
hey dont choke up or in the throat clam,
They are always smiling with eyes dry.

I never ever wanted to cry for you
Since that day, I needed to be strong,
I needed to know that i was all the way wrong,
I never ever had ever loved you,

Today it rained and i thought of you,
My heart felt cold again but skipped the bleat,
There was a feeling so strong, so new,
It hit me and i felt my shaking feet.

I wanted to drown myself, drain it away,
I needed to hide the feelings on my face,
Towards the door i reached in a sway,
And drenched ran out in the rain,

My face burning hot with the pain,
I looked up to the sky and saw you smiling,
"Its ok to cry" you said " i will think it is rain",
So i burst out like a cloud, that for seasons was piling.


I cried out loud, Your name i was crying,
Till my head was filled with you, bursting, burning,
I needed to hug you so i could atleast die,
Never again then i will ever have to cry, Cry for you

To hug me tight your arm then never came,
Gone with the fading cloud was all i could blame,
I clutched my fist to the sky you were there so near,
But then you dropped from my palm with my last tear,

IN THE COLD

Why does it hurt when you feel alone
Cutting in deep straight through the bone?
Surrounded by darkness and feeling so cold
Wanting touch when theres no one to hold
Wanting to talk when theres no one to hear
Alone in the dark drowning with fear

Why does it hurt when you feel all alone
Taken from the warm feelings you once had known?
With eyes like clouds and tears like rain
Drivin inside deep is the pain
A broken heart that just won't mend
Feelin alone in the world without a friend

Why does it hurt when you feel all alone?
When you once stood in the light, the sun had shone
Hiding within the darkest despair
A feeling within thinking no one will care
Misery is the only company you got
For when you feel alone, you feel it alot